space-oddity's Diaryland Diary

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howdy doody time

"he probably doesn't even have a basement . . .
with children in it!"
those words came out of my mother's mouth last night as we sat in front of the tantrum (that's a television; i used to have an entire entry devoted to kurt vonnegut and his term of "tantrum" but that was in a different diary and that entry has since been deleted .. so shoot me in the head.. for so long i've been wanting to refer to the television set as the "tantrum," but have not, for i've feared that no one would understand, and i've probably done a horrible job in explaining myself & the tantrum this time around anyways, and so .. on with the rest);
we were watching pollyanna with hayley mills, and i suppose you'd kind of have to know the story of pollyanna to understand why that quote from my mother is funny, and if you know it well, and you still don't quite know why i was rolling on the floor, well, then, i guess you'd just have to know my mother.
she's the type that enjoys the nightly made-for-tv-movie, and upon stepping into a video store, she goes straight for the cheesy crap in the "family" section, and some of her favorite movies involve talking animals or animals that play sports, like "air bud" or "air bud: world pup" or "m.v.p.:most valuable primate" . . just to name a few. she also loves all of the mighty ducks series.
. . and quite frankly, she's the reason why so many of those horrible movies keep on getting made in the first place.
everyday i walk into work and someone asks me,
"what's new and good?"
and i haven't much to say because most of what's new is bad, and i've got people like my mother to thank for it.
how i came from that womb, i do not know.
so, of course, we were watching pollyanna last night.
today it was frequent flyer. this little jewel tries to pass polygamy off as a light and humorous subject; it is a movie full of all of those neat little shenanigans one would find in any movie shown on the lifetime movie network.
christ, are these the movies that women really want to see???
anywho, my mother says the craziest shit sometimes.
"she knows not what she says," as my stepfather likes to put it.

. . . so i love the holidays. it's a time full of love and sharing and grace and television. my ass has barely left my mother's sofa in three days, but what else am i to do?
i watched nearly 15 hours of trading spaces yesterday.
it's a disease, and i am normally without cable. put these factors together along with the fact that my mother has satellite and that there was a ts marathon on yesterday, and you get one sorry lump curled up on the sofa with xmas chocolate wrappers sprinkled about her lumpy sock-covered feet.
yeah, that's right. not a sight for sore eyes; that's for sure. near three a.m this morning i had started to feel a little like the trash heap from fraggle rock.

tomorrow i will drive, yet again, to visit more family. this time it's my father and his lovely family.
a fucking nightmare, more like.
wish me luck;
wish me no flat tires.

8:38 pm - Wednesday, Dec. 26, 2001

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