space-oddity's Diaryland Diary

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the idiot i've been

about a week ago i fell down the stairs when i was acting like an idiot and thought that i should just run down them instead of walking down them like the rest of the civilized world, and wouldn't you know, whoops! i busted my ass.... and my ankle, as it would turn out. it's not broken or anything - just kind of sprained, and i guess i have weak ankles or something 'cos i keep on twisting it and fucking it up just about everyday. i'll just walk into the kitchen and then put my foot down the wrong way, and yep, there it goes again . . .
sharp pains going up and down and around my ankle.
it's swollen, and it hurts.
i'm such an idiot.

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by the way, i'm so sorry i'm not perfect. that's what i feel like shouting at the top of my lungs at times. lately i've been coming across many situations that set this scenario up for me perfectly. i start to wonder where all the good people are,
the good, forgiving people.

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can't you tell? i've been drinking, and i've been thinking about the last couple of months,
over and over and over again in my head.

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and by the way, what's so wrong about speaking the truth anyways?
at least that's one of the only things i've ever done that was wrong.

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i'm sorry if i start to see right through you.
it's totally something that i've never been able to help.

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2:21 a.m. - 2001-08-09

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