space-oddity's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- freaking out jerry maguire style this guy at work, he has a lisp. we have the same job. he sits in a cubicle and sells women's clothes all day long. yeah, it's a real bitch. i sat at a table with him when we all went to a banquet last year. he told me about his wife and his back problems and his kids. he leaned over to tell me i look very much like his daughter. he told the whole table. i thought maybe his daughter is the "bizarro leslie" that everyone has seen around town. i get that a lot - "excuse me, but do you work at panera bread?... you don't? i swear to god i saw you working there.." nope. not me. so he took out his wallet to show us all. she had blonde hair, blue eyes. i'm half chinese/japanese, and i have black hair with brown eyes. he said, "see, you look alike - in the face." "hmmm..," i said. the whole table said, "hmmm.." we went back to eating our chicken cordon bleu because that is what people eat when they go to a banquet, that or roast beef. anywho, i've been watching him lately, and he is about to break. i can see it in his face. everytime he has to get up from his desk because some hoity toity on the phone wants him to go measure a sleeve length or something .. everytime he gets up he's grimacing through that smile. it's very visible. all you have to do is glance over, and you can see it. he's gonna have a nervous breakdown. this certainly is not his dream job, and as nice as he is, i'm sure he fucking hates what he does, as do i. he's all smiley and stuff, and he's just going, "fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck..," over and over in his head. he's going to come into work soon, gun in hand, arms flailing all over the damn place. he'll make a big jerry-maguire type scene. he'll say, "i fucking hate this job!!! i fucking hate all of you!!! and.. and.. I'M GAY!!! i'm gay..." this is where he starts to sob uncontrollably. his entire being will go limp, and his body will sink down against the wall by the watercooler. he'll accidently shoot himself in the foot. finally, something interesting happening at work. so the two cats are not getting along. they fight all the time, in between naps. the new cat doesn't like me. i don't think. he makes weird noises when i pet him, and then i get scared 'cos i think he'll bite me like he does libby, so i pull away. but he's really cute, i'll try to post some kind of picture soon. like any of you suckazzzz care. i placed a catalog order from jcrew tonight. i had never done that over the phone. i normally just order from the internet. so imagine my surprise when the guy taking my order said i was pre-approved for a jcrew card with a $1000 limit... wha??? that's fucked up. how do you just give someone a thousand dollars without knowing their social security number, credit history, etc. by the looks of my mailbox, i'm guessing my history is looking pretty good, considering i get about two credit card offers everyday, but jebus. weird stuff. i wonder if it's a cheap ploy. maybe if i had accepted the offer, i'd end up getting a notice in the mail that's like, "we're sorry, but that credit limit we told you was a big fat lie. we really don't trust you that much. here's the new reduced limit of $125. thank you." who knows. oh well. credit cards are the devil. oh, and i have to wake up at 5:45 a.m. to do a full-store inventory at the video store. fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck... 12:04 am - 05.06.03 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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